Sockets & Plugs: The Problem and The Solution

I want to start this post by disclaiming that on a scale of one (lowest degree) and ten (highest degree) of lameness, I am definitely a 9.5 right now.

When I was little I used to slither around on carpet in socks to pick up friction and then zap my little brother with a slight shock. Yes, that's just the kind of older sister I was: annoying. If we jump to plugging it in because we feel like it fits right and crave that electric wave, when will we get a chance to electrocute each other the good old fashioned way... gathering up friction through engaging in conversation, activities and things that will electrify even the slightest touch between us.

I am Entrepeanutbutter and when I think problem... I think SOLUTION. So, my solution is child proof socket covers! Because we need to plug our sockets until our child is old enough to handle the socket responsibly. Well, when we meet boys we like, it's like we revert back to being a child. Not just us girls, but also the boys. We both act like kids.

SOLUTION: COVER YOUR SOCKET UNTIL THE RELATIONSHIP IS OLD ENOUGH TO HANDLE PLUGS AND ELECTRIC ACTIVITY RESPONSIBLY.

Things Have Changed: A Night At Club Voyeur

Ladies, last night I made my first trip to one of LA's hottest new nightclubs, Voyeur. I'll admit it's been a while since I've gone clubbing (having a husband will do that to you) but apparently in my absence, more has changed than just the names of the venues (as anyone from LA will tell you, the names of nightclubs change as quickly as Paris Hilton swaps boyfriends).

At Voyeur--as the name clearly suggest--the experience is all about watching. It's a relatively small space, but what the club is lacking in square footage, it makes up in women. And no, I'm not talking about the slew of twenty-something scantily-clad girls that wait in line to cozy up to boys with tables. I'm talking about the club's professional dancers. Voyeur has taken the go-go dancer to the next level. By undressing her. Yes ladies, Voyeur is filled with topless women.

These women hang from the ceiling, writhing around on a cargo net, they are on very low stage, they hang from a Velcro wall, they dance in glass boxes, they are everywhere. When the first dancer took her top off, I looked over at Entrepeanutbutter, my partner in crime for the evening, and both of our mouths were agape.

When did this happen? When were nightclubs and strip clubs merged? In an environment that is dominated by super hot, masked, naked women, how do the regular (clothed) girls compete? I know that no woman of this day and age actually expects to meet a boyfriend at a night club, but how can you even find someone to party with when all the men in the room are well, embracing their inner voyeurs?