Relationship Tofu

I wish I could take credit for this concept, but sadly someone from Gawker.com beat me to it...

The post is about Deanna Pappas, this season's Bachelorette on ABC. She is down to choosing between two men:

"Pappas explained the difficult-to-grasp concept of having to choose between "two totally different people. You got one guy on one hand, and another guy on another hand, and I'm two totally different people with each guy." This suggests that Pappas is the relationship equivalent of tofu, her spongy personality absorbing the flavors of any man with which she comes in contact."

And so was born the concept of being "human tofu." We've all experienced how being with different partners can bring out different qualities in us... but, there is a great danger in allowing each man you are with to define who you are, what you want, and how you live.

I think that "human tofu syndrome" afflicts those who lack a strong sense of identity. Just like unflavored tofu, until you dig deep and decide who you are, you might think you are pretty bland and malleable. The truth is - we all have preferences. We are all distinctive people. And at the end of the day, you should be the one choosing what flavor you want to be - rather than merely absorbing the qualities and preferences of the one you happen to be with.

Because we all know, unlike real tofu, which I'm certain revels in its endless potential as the chameleon of the food world, being relationship tofu can be draining and lead to a lot of self-doubt and low self-esteem.

No Man Land Rule: Flavor yourself (before someone else does)