This post is in response to your last one Peanut, about Mindfulness. I was going to post a comment - but I believe that an actual post is in order.Peanut, I urge you to mind the gaps. Don't fill them in. Let me explain.
Reading your last post, I realized that you are in the process of committing the cardinal sin of dating (one that we all unfortunately fall prey to): you are unilaterally going back and analyzing the past, and in the process, filling in all the gaps to try to understand what went wrong.
It is truly heart-breaking when a relationship that is going so well seemingly dissapates overnight. And of course, we all have a tendency to find a way to blame ourselves - as you did, when you went into your analysis.
It is quite possible that you did nothing wrong at all - that things just didn't work out. Although I totally agree with you that it is important to live in the moment and be mindful - I don't believe going back and retracing your every step on every date is mindfulness - I think in fact it is the opposite.
We all need to be wary of filling in the gaps when things don't work out. It only leads to an endless amount of analysis, that is almost always at our own expense.
So my love, keep in this moment by realizing that he was the luckiest and so will the next man to enter into your life. The only difference is - the next one will hopefully realize just how lucky he is.
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