Although we've all heard this quote a million times (and most probably ventured to use it a time or two ourselves) I've never stopped to consider, where does this adage come from? Well, thanks to some Internet research, I've discovered that it traces back to John Lyly's 'Euphues' (1578). The original quote was "The rules of fair play do not apply in love and war." Mr. Lyly was an author during the Renaissance.
The question is: why put love and war, so seemingly different concepts into the same little idiom? It seems that in both instances, passion is the fuel, and when passion is ignited, there is oftentimes no containing the fire... or the collateral damage.
If all is fair in love, that means that cheating, lying, and causing pain are all a ok. And with regard to war, that means that even the atom bomb is justified. If all is fair, there is no tactic off limits.
And for that reason, I argue that there are in fact rules. That all is not fair in love or war. That there are certain, fundamental decencies that must transcend the passionate rage that is oftentimes love, and more oftentimes war.
No Man Land Rule: Be fair in love and war. Otherwise you might just end up with "the war of the roses"
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